Booty Basics 101: The Ultimate Guide to Anal Play & Anal Toys

It’s the ultimate ATMS guide to anal play!

Our butts have so much pleasure potential and anal pleasure isn’t specific to any gender or sexuality. We can all explore different forms of anal play from booty massage to toys to penetration. But it’s the butt, of course, so there are a few extra steps you need to take to ensure that your anal play session is comfortable and pleasurable.

Our 101 guide has everything you need to know about anal play:

Anal play myths
Why people are into it
How to prep for anal play
Different types of anal play
Different anal toys
Anal lubricant
How to play safely
How to talk about anal with your partner
How to clean up after anal

Good anal play requires education, communication, relaxation, lubrication and exploration. And when all of those combine, you get pleasure!

Anal play myths

Unfortunately, there are still plenty of myths surrounding anal play, so let’s start with these and discuss why you shouldn’t give them too much thought.

Myth #1. Anal sex is gay

Experiencing anal pleasure does not make you gay, and there are masses of heterosexual people and gay people (and everything in between) that love anal pleasure. The pleasure you are into does not dictate your sexuality. Who you are attracted to dictates your sexuality.

Myth #2. Anal sex is gross & messy

There are some really simple things you can do to prevent a mess, which we’ll talk about soon. But also, let’s not be ashamed of our bodies and how they function. This is your butt, and it has a job to do. Any sort of anal pleasure is just a bonus for this area.

Myth #3. Anal sex is painful

Unless you are into consensual pain play, then anal play should not be painful. Anal play should be comfortable, pleasurable and pain-free!

Myth #4. Anal sex results in infection

Like all partnered sexual play, anal involves risk but, there are simple steps to mitigate that risk and play as safely as possible.

Why are people into anal play?

The anus is an area with so much pleasure potential! There are many reasons why people are into anal play, and it feels good to people for all sorts of different reasons. Here are some of the main reasons people are into it.

The anus has a high concentration of nerve endings

The opening of the anus has a huge amount of nerve endings which feel very pleasurable when stimulated. The booty has the second highest concentration of nerve endings in the body, following the clitoris and penis. Yes, more than the vagina, which is one of the reasons that so many women and people with vulvas love anal play.

The good news is that these nerve endings are at the opening, so external anal play with a tongue or finger can reach many of these too.

Stimulating the anus can make orgasms feel stronger

Stimulating the anus alongside pleasure in other areas can make your orgasm feel a lot more intense. Anal toys can make you feel full as they stretch the sphincter muscles, and this sensation is unlike anything else. It can feel very exciting for people and make them feel highly sensitive.

Including a butt plug alongside clitoral, vaginal or penile stimulation is an easy way to take your pleasure to the next level.

The prostate is highly sensitive

For those with a prostate, anal penetration can feel especially incredible. The prostate is a gland that sits between the bladder and the base of the penis and is part of the reproductive anatomy. A lot of the fluid that makes up ejaculate comes from here. And it feels very pleasurable when massaged. A prostate orgasm is said to feel a lot like a penile orgasm but much more intense and felt throughout the whole body.

The prostate can be stimulated via the anus with internal toys or from outside the body by applying pressure to the perineum.

Anal toys can indirectly stimulate the clitoris

Yes, you read that right. There’s a lot more to the clitoris than what you can see. The glans on the outside of the body is just the tip of the iceberg. The majority of the clitoris is internal. The clitoris is a wishbone shape inside the body, with the vestibular bulbs and the crura or legs surrounding the vaginal canal.

It’s believed that the majority of sensations experienced during vaginal stimulation are caused by pressure on the bulbs and legs of the clitoris. So, a lot of the pleasure experienced through anal play is indirect stimulation of the clitoris through the shared wall between the anus and the vagina.

As well as the physical pleasure benefits, anal play can also have emotional benefits. There is still some taboo around anal play, so it can feel exciting and naughty to explore it. And trying new things in the bedroom with a partner is a great way to feel more intimate and connected. Plus, it’s just fun!

How to prepare for anal play

How much preparation you do before anal play is up to you. It’s about getting your mind and body ready for some anal action. These suggestions are all about helping you to feel comfortable and relaxed so you can enjoy what you are doing rather than worrying.

Schedule your anal sessions

If you schedule it, then you can ensure your body is ready for action when the time comes. Think about what you are eating and drinking in the 24 hours before. Are there particular foods or drinks that you know upset your stomach? Avoid them. And make sure you eat adequate fibre (without going overboard) and drink lots of water. This will help to ensure you are regular and won’t have any surprises.

Use the bathroom

Make sure you have pooped already if you are wanting to explore internal anal play. If you haven’t been that day, you might feel extra pressure in your anal canal which won’t be fun worrying about it. If you are blocked up, saving it for another day might be a better idea.

Use a douche if you want to

Douching before anal play isn’t essential but lots of people like to do it so they can relax. Douching involves using a bulb to insert water into the anus, then releasing it to clear out the canal before play and make sure it's squeaky clean in there.

If you are going to douche, do it an hour or so before you intend to play to ensure that all the water is cleared out of the body. You can do it over the toilet or in the shower.

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Have a shower

Jump in the shower to ensure that the outside of your body is fresh and clean too. The warm water will help your body to relax and feel ready for action. There are also body and toy wipes that work perfectly for freshening up if you are in a rush.

Get turned on

Anal play is going to feel a lot better if you are super aroused. This might mean starting with lots of kissing, sucking, foreplay or even a full-body massage. This will help to relax the sphincter muscles making the insertion of toys, fingers or a penis easier.

Adding in some stimulation in the front before, during and after you play is going to help too. Touch your penis, clitoris, vagina or whatever you are working with. Stimulating these parts of your body will help to get you relaxed and feeling good.

Use lots of lubricant

The booty is not self-lubricating, so you need to add that essential slipperiness to ensure a pain-free and pleasurable experience. Lubricant is essential for internal play but can also make external play a lot more comfortable.

We'll talk more about the best lubricant for anal sex a bit later in this article.

Start with external play

Even if you plan to get inside the butt, you want to start on the outside to ensure the sphincter muscles are thoroughly prepped for penetration. You can start with a butt massage, rimming or lightly fingering the anus first before moving into bigger toys or body parts. If you are fingering, ensure your nails have no ragged or sharp edges!

Using a vibrator on the outside of the booty first is also a great way to warm up the muscles. Vibration helps your muscles to relax making access to the anus easier.

Start with a small toy

Start small and work your up to larger sizes. This will ensure that your muscles can stretch around a toy without tearing or being injured. Treat your sphincter muscles like any other muscle and train them to receive the toy you want.

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Read more: How to prepare for anal play.

Different types of anal play

There are so many different ways to explore anal play. Even if you are a total beginner or are wary of penetrating the booty, there are lots of ways to play.

External anal play

Butt massage

A butt massage is the perfect introduction to anal play. It’s easy, requires little prep and is a lovely thing to do for your partner. You can focus solely on the cheeks if you choose or include massage around the outside of the butthole too. This area is very sensitive so can feel extremely pleasurable for people.

You can always do this with a finger vibrator on too to add some vibrating goodness to your anal massage.

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Rim jobs

A rim job takes things a bit further by using your tongue to massage the outside of the butthole. It’s extremely intimate and pleasurable but does a bit more prep as you want to be completely clean before going near the butt with your mouth.

Perineum massage

A perineum massage focuses on the section between the vagina and booty or the scrotum and butthole. This area is quite sensitive, particularly for those with a prostate, which can be stimulated via this massage. It’s great as a part of oral sex!

Internal anal play

Anal sex

Anal sex involves one partner anally penetrating the other with their penis. This activity happens in both queer and heterosexual relationships and can be very pleasurable for both the person doing the penetrating and the person being penetrated.

Pegging

Pegging or strap-on sex refers to one partner anally penetrating the other with a dildo, which is usually held in place with a strap-on harness. The term pegging is often used to reference a woman penetrating a man with a dildo, but I prefer strap-on sex as it refers to any gender.

Penetration with toys

Anal toys are big business, and there are many ways to penetrate the booty with toys! Here are the most popular anal toys.

The different types of anal toys

Butt plugs

Butt Plugs are bulb-shaped toys that are inserted into the anus and stay in place during play. Butt plugs have a bulb (the wide part that goes inside the body), the neck (the narrow part that sits between your sphincter muscles), and a flared base (the widest part which sits outside of the body to secure the plug in place and ensure that it doesn’t go up into the anal canal). The natural response of your sphincter muscles is to pull things in once they move through them, so every anal toy needs to have a flared base, a retrieval cord or a handle.

No base, no trace queens!

Butt plugs stretch your booty and put pressure on the walls of the anal canal, making the body feel full. Plugs also put pressure on the many nerve endings at the opening of the anus, stimulating them and creating a very pleasurable sensation.

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Check out our full range of Butt Plugs.

Different types of butt plugs - Butt plug tails

A butt plug tail is the same as a classic butt plug but with one very exciting addition, a tail! The tail will dangle outside of the body to add some swishing satisfaction to your playtime. These toys are ideal for different types of roleplays or can just be a cute addition to your anal session.

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Check out our full range of Butt Plug Tails.

Read more: Beginner’s guide to butt plug tails.

Different types of butt plugs - Metal butt plugs

Metal butt plugs are simply butt plugs made from metal. What sets them apart from other plugs is how heavy they are. A metal butt plug is going to provide more weight inside your body, increasing the stimulation of all the pleasurable nerve endings. Plus, many metal butt plugs have cute gems on the end that add some sparkle to your booty.

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Different types of butt plugs - Tunnel butt plugs

Tunnel butt plugs, more commonly known as tunnel plugs, are butt plugs with a tunnel through them. The tunnel opens the butt up to all kinds of play like lube insertion, a finger or a small vibrator. Or they can be used to open the booty for humiliation play.

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Check out our full range of Tunnel Butt Plugs.

Different types of butt plugs - Rimming butt plugs

Rimming butt plugs take things up a notch by including rotating beads in the neck of the plug. This is designed to replicate the feeling of a rim job and stimulate the most sensitive part of the booty. In many cases, rimming plugs will also vibrate for even more anal stimulation.

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Check out our full range of Rimming Butt Plugs.

Anal beads

Anal beads are a great toy for those that are new to anal play. Anal beads consist of multiple beads along a chain connected to a wide retrieval cord. In most cases, the beads will graduate in size, starting small at the tip and becoming larger the closer they get to the handle.

The idea with anal beads is that they are inserted into the body one at a time and can be moved in and out or pulled out firmly during orgasm. As each bead moves in or out, it will massage the highly sensitive sphincter muscles.

What’s great about anal beads is that they still feel very pleasurable even if you only use the smaller beads. You can start small and move up to the larger sizes later if you want to.

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Anal vibrators

An anal vibrator is any kind of anal toy that vibrates. It could be a vibrating plug, beads or prostate massager. These are popular for a few reasons. The first is that vibration helps to relax the sphincter muscles making insertion of larger toys or a penis easier. As well as that, vibration can also stimulate deeper inside the body as it reaches many more nerve endings so can result in powerful orgasms.

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Prostate massagers

Prostate massagers are a particular type of anal toy that is designed with prostate stimulation in mind. They will normally have a curved shape and a bulbous tip. They tend to be made from a firm silicone material.

This is because the prostate responds well to direct massage and pressure, so a wide, firm tip is likely to reach just the right spot. Most other anal toys are capable of reaching this area but may take a bit of manoeuvring to stimulate the area properly. P-spot massagers take the guesswork out of it, ensuring a perfect fit.

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Check out our full range of Prostate Vibrators.

Anal probes

An anal probe takes its name from the medical community, but in the world of sex toys, it refers to a long, thin toy that can be inserted into the anus. They can be vibrating or still and are often a similar width to a finger making them perfect for those that are new to anal insertables.

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Anal dildos

An anal dildo is any dildo that is suitable for anal use. That means it has a flared base, often in the form of a suction cup base, and is made from a non-porous material that can be sterilized between uses. It’s the butt after all! Silicone dildos are extremely popular for this reason.

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Pegging dildos

Pegging dildos are used for pegging where someone is penetrated anally with a dildo, usually held in place with a strap-on harness. These dildos tend to be small and thin without too much texture so that they can slide in and out easily.

In some cases, they will also have a slight curve to reach the prostate.

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Check out our full range of Pegging Dildos.

Anal training kits

An anal training kit is a set of 3 or more butt plugs that graduate in size, helping you to ease into larger sizes. You start with the smallest plug and move to larger sizes as your body becomes comfortable.

Anal training kits are all about giving your body adequate time, care and stretch to move up to those larger sizes. It’s the safest way to reach your size goals without harming your body.

If you plan to use a kit to prepare your body for anal play with a penis, you need to make sure the largest plug in the set is about the same size or slightly larger than the penis. That way, when it comes to having anal sex, your body should be pretty well prepared.

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Check out our full range of Anal Training Kits.

Lubricant is essential for anal play

No matter what type of anal play you are indulging in, you need to use lubricant. And lots of it! Here are the main types and what each one is good for.

Water-based anal lubricant

Water-based lubricant is a must-have for everyone. It's safe to use with all orifices, all toy types and all condom types. The one downside is that it is the thinnest and fastest drying of the lubes. That’s why anal-specific water-based lube exists. Water-based lube has a thicker formula, which provides some nice cushion and lasts a lot longer than the classic versions. This type of lube is ideal for use with silicone anal toys. Some toys can react with silicone lubricant, so it’s a good idea to stick with water-based lube if you aren’t sure.

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Check out our full range of Water-based Lubricant.

Silicone lubricant

Although not great with silicone sex toys, silicone lubricant is a great lubricant for other forms of anal play. It’s incredibly silky and long-lasting and won’t dry out during play.

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Check out our full range of Silicone Lubricant.

Oil-based lubricant

If you want something thick and seriously long-lasting, oil-based lube is the way to go. This lube is the thicker you can get your hands on, so it adds some nice cushioning as well as the essential slipperiness you want from an anal lube. The downside is that it’s likely to stain sheets, and you'll have to wash it off afterwards as it won’t dry out.

It’s also not safe with latex condoms as oil breaks down latex.

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Hybrid lubricant

Hybrid lubricant is a great choice for anal play. It uses a combination of water and silicone or water and oil to make a hybrid formula with the benefits of both.

A silicone/ water hybrid is silkier and longer-lasting than water-based and is safe to use with silicone sex toys and is fine with condoms.

An oil/ water hybrid is long-lasting and has a thick formula which makes anal play comfortable. But this type of lube is not compatible with latex condoms.

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Check out our full range of Hybrid Lubricant.

How to safely enjoy anal play

Go slow

The anus is a very delicate part of the body, and the tissues can easily be torn if you go too hard, too fast or are too rough with play. Lubricant will help to prevent this but regardless of how much lube you use, you need to start slowly to properly warm up and relax the sphincter muscles.

Don’t use a numbing product

It might be tempting to use a numbing product, particularly if it's your first time with anal play but we don’t recommend it. Anal play is not supposed to hurt, and pain is a sign that something is wrong and that you should stop. Pain could mean that you haven’t warmed up and stretched your sphincter muscles enough, that the toy or body part you are using is too big and you need to train more with smaller toys or that you aren’t using enough lube.

All of these can result in tears or anal fissures if you continue. That’s why you need to be able to feel what is happening so that you can stop if there is pain and prevent injury to your body.

Listen to your body

Always pay attention to what is happening and how you are feeling while you play. Penetration of the booty can feel weird if you are new to it, but it should not be painful. If it is painful that means something is wrong. It could be that what you are using is too big and that you aren’t warmed up enough for it. It could mean that you are not using enough lube, or it could be that today is simply not the day for anal play and you need to try again another time. And that’s all good!

Have safe sex

It’s important to note that infections, bacteria and diseases, including STIs, can be transmitted through anal sex just as they can be through vaginal sex. It’s a good idea to use condoms if you’re participating in anal sex with a partner and aren’t sure of their sexual history. Or if you are sharing sex toys with a partner, you can pop a condom over the top of the toy to stay protected.

Establish your limits beforehand

If you are playing with a partner, it’s important to establish any limits beforehand so you are both comfortable and happy throughout the whole session. And check in with each other frequently to ensure that the speed, pressure and sensations are still feeling good.

A flared base is essential!

I know I’ve said this already but if your toy does not have a big enough flared base, it will get sucked into your butt and you will need to go to the emergency room to get it removed. Not every toy is an anal toy so make sure you choose correctly and seek help from our customer care team if you aren’t sure.

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How to talk about anal play with your partner

Everybody has a butt! Which is why anal play can be incredibly fun and pleasurable for everyone in the bedroom. But for some, anal play is associated with negative thoughts from the get-go. People are worried about the potential of pain and uncleanliness or are just a little freaked out in general about the idea of someone or something touching their butt.

And that’s okay! We all have different things that get us off and that we find pleasurable. If your partner isn’t sure about anal play, here are some tips to help them understand why you want to explore it and how you want them to be involved.

Communicate openly

Like anything in the bedroom, communication is key! It’s always important to talk about anything new you’d like to try in the sheets to ensure you are both on the same page and that anything happening is completely consensual.

Let your partner know why you’re interested in trying anal with them. Whether it’s the pleasure aspect, trying something new, or because you enjoy anal play alone, explaining your point of view can work wonders and help them open up to it.

Here’s a few conversation starters:

Say you had a sex dream about it, and it seemed amazing.
Anal porn – is it a turn-on?
Do a yes, no, maybe list. Each fill out a list, switch and check if you are both a match.
“Stumble” onto the anal toy category when you are shopping online at ATMS next.

Remember that your partner may say no, and you need to respect that. But there are all sorts of ways to enjoy anal play solo. It’s the best way to start your anal journey anyway!

How to clean up after anal play

As it’s the butt you’re playing with, you want to ensure that you are cleaning up properly after you play. Don’t really, it’s still easy!

With anal play, I recommend popping a towel down to protect your sheets from any potential mess, especially as you will be using lots of lube, and this will keep your bedding nice and fresh.

If you are playing with anal toys, have a bowl or extra towel beside the bed so you can pop them on that once they are removed from your body. That way, you can keep them off your bed or floor until you are ready to clean them.

To clean your toys, give them a good wash with antibacterial toy cleaner, ensuring that you get into any ridges or textured parts well. If your toy is motorised, check out whether it’s waterproof or not. If it's not, you will need to be particularly careful around the charging port. You can spritz it with cleaner, rub it in, and then use a damp cloth to wipe it off.

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Having a shower afterwards is a nice way to top off a lovely anal session and make you feel fresh.

It’s ok to feel a little sensitive after anal play, even if you warmed up properly and used lots of lube. But it shouldn’t be sore. If it does, you might need to up your level of prep and lube and go even slower next time.

Anal play should be fun and pleasurable, so hopefully, this has inspired you to give it a go. Head to our anal toy category to check the different anal toys.

Check out our full range of Anal toys here.

Learn more about anal play:

Content Disclaimer:

The information in this article has been fact checked and reviewed for accuracy by Adulttoymegastore’s team of content specialists and sexual wellness experts, including Sex Educator Emma Hewitt.

Adulttoymegastore does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment for illness. Any information published on this website, either by Adulttoymegastore or its authors, is not intended to be a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a medical professional.